Wow, where am I? Everything looks so different. I must appologize for my lack of updates. I wasn't even sure I was ever going to make another entry until a few minutes ago. I started keeping a personal journal with daily entries where I can say stuff without worrying about keeping myself and others anonymous, or holding the attention of an audience, or worry about how others may interpert my own babblings. So many things happened in such a short period of time I didn't feel there was a way to condense everything succinctly. But I'm going to skip an enourmous amount of details and show my readers that I can Party Hardcore with the rest of the alcoholic sex orgy people.
A lot's happened. It feels like everything's happened. I am still working on my novel. It's is an enourmously difficult, painful, personal, painstakingly slow novel to write. I can't tell you how much worry, pain, anxiety, love, and joy has gone into the writting process thus far. I'm about three months in and barely past the size of my last novella, Misplaced Girl, which was just over twelve thousand words. It took me three weeks to write that which means I'm writing at roughly a quarter of the speed. However, there's still quite a ways before this novel is finished, and it's just plain better in so many ways. It's just two individuals gropping their way through the darkness in the most beautiful way possible. I'll refrain from giving away any more details.
There is a girl. For the first time in more years than I would care to admit (four or five, incidentally) I've developed some rather strong feelings for an individual girl. This has not been a repeat of middle school, thank God. My feelings developed from the little I knew about her as a person, not some intense physical lust. I've grown to know her since then, befriend her, and even formed a loose creative partnership with her. We've written and performed together in and out of drama class (where we met). We've become good friends. But I can't say if she could see us as anything more. I don't want to expand on any more details than what I've already presented, because I feel that I cannot give out a little bit more without feeling compelled to give out everything, which judging from my personal journal entries would constitute maybe as much as ten thousand words.
The school's doing a performance of Alice in Wonderland and I get to be both the Herald (a bit part) and Teen Gets a Giant Cock (a big part as far as most parts go in this play). Thus, I'm fufilling the promise I made to myself after the last school play which I was absent from.
I've been emotionally all over the place. I've been in torturous agony and the higher extremes of elation. Overall though, I'd say I'm pretty well off and in what has been and will continue to be one of the most interesting periods in anyone's life: their senior year of high school.